Archive for the ‘The Great Sluggliness’ Category

I don’t quite know how to say this but… I think I’ve done something I didn’t quite mean to.

So, back at midsummer I went off into the woods and did a little ritual. It was an interesting experience and I learnt a lot from it (not least being that charcoal can be even harder to light when outside in the rain!). The thing is, ever since then I’ve had this growing feeling that something’s following me. And I’m very specific, something not someone. And by thing I mean slugs.

Yes slugs.

When I was camping out on midsummer I was kept awake by the sounds of small slugs crawling across my canvas. This happened multiple times during the night but hey, it was the woods and it was wet. so what did I expect.

The following morning there were slugs everywhere all over the forest floor and dotted over the footpath as I made my way back to civilisation. But I was in the woods and it was wet; what did I expect.

Then a few days ago I noticed what I can only really describe as tell-tale signs of slug activity in my kitchen. But, I mean umm, I live in a basement, so my flat is a bit humid and underground; so that’s to be expected right? Right?

At this point I was starting to get a little weirded out. I started to get a lot more weirded out when I read the following extract in a novel by Dine Fortune:

The relevant paragraph reads

“He spoke aloud to the shadows the magical formula which the book declared to be suitable to the occasion. Then he waited. Absolutely nothing happened, and disgusted with the whole proceeding, himself included, he turned out the gas and went home, and so to bed…and would have thought no more of his nightmare had it not been that in the morning, when he placed a reluctant foot upon the shabby oilcloth that paved his meagre attic, he perceived that the floor was covered with slimy tracks as if an army of slugs had passed across it.”
At which point I started to get seriously weirded out. I mean, one instance of slugs is fine, two is a coincidence, three starts to get a bit odd and when they’re even cropping up in eerily similar circumstances in the books I’m reading it’s high time to say enough is enough.
I guess what I’m saying is… help… I think I’ve accidentally performed a ritual of… slug summoning?
I mean, from a little online research it looks like slugs are by and large looked on well in folklore and shamanic traditions. I just wonder if they wouldn’t mind awfully not coming into my home?
Perhaps I should go back to the woods, undo the ritual that I performed back at midsummer. Or maybe just go there and ask them if they wouldn’t mind awfully just sodding off for a while?